Mercury retrograde ends today! Congrats; you made it. I’m sure a lot of lessons were learned, and darkness was brought to light. Mercury represents several things, with communication and socialization being the most notable. These traits are huge factors in our relationships, which is why during Mercury retrograde, we often see ex friends/lovers and anyone we have estranged relationships with coming back. Especially since this Mercury retrograde came into conjunction with Venus, the planet of beauty, wealth, and- you guessed it- relationships. Now, this isn’t a post about astrology, but this planetary action has affected many people, and a lot of us have been tested and/or received closure about our past relationships. Now that we’ve learned our lessons, many of us want to finally leave those relationships in the past. That’s where cord cutting comes in!
Before we get into cord cutting, it would be helpful to know what a cord is first. Cords are the bonds we build with people in our lives. After spending a significant amount of time with someone, getting to know them, etc., we become energetically connected to them. Sometimes we can still feel another person’s energy present with us, even if they’re not physically nearby. Cords between two people strengthen the capacity for empathy between them, and they can be great if you have a pleasant, healthy relationship with a person. It’s great to still feel your loved ones with you, even when they’re elsewhere, right? However, cords can also be difficult to deal with if you do not have a healthy connection with that person. Have you ever had a bad breakup, and even after you’ve cried and healed and moved on, it still feels like your ex is creeping on you? They could actually creeping, but it could also mean that you two are still energetically connected, and a cord needs to be cut.
So how do we cut cords? Well, I have a ritual you can try! However, keep this in mind: if you have not fully healed and taken in the lessons from the past relationship, cord cutting will not work. Cry it out, scream it out, journal, meditate, take care of yourself, talk to friends or family, and even seek therapy if you need to. But, you cannot use cord cutting to bypass the inner work. If you are not ready to fully let go of the person or the situation, you will remain at square one. You have to forgive them and yourself for what happened. You have to be okay with potentially never seeing or speaking to this person ever again if you want to successfully cut cords. You have to completely surrender.
With that being said, here is my personal cord cutting ritual.
Cut the Cord
- A quiet space where you won’t be disturbed for some time
- Sage, palo santo, cedarwood, or any other cleansing herb or incense
- Any crystal that corresponds with your root, sacral, heart, and/or throat chakra, preferably heart (ex: black tourmaline, red jasper, carnelian, moonstone, rose quartz, jade, celestite, angelite)
- Paper and a pen/pencil
- Lighter (preferably a grill lighter to prevent burning yourself!)
- A heat-safe, non-flammable bowl
Notes before you begin the ritual:
- If you’re waiting until after school or work to start, get home, eat, take a shower, wear comfy clothes, and get settled in before you start the ritual. You can also shower again after the ritual for even better results.
- Make sure you are not wearing loose, flowy clothing that could easily catch on fire. Make sure you are not in an area with something that could easily catch on fire. You could even do the ritual outside if you wish. If you are a minor, do not do this without parental permission and supervision. Be smart and safe. You have been warned, so I am not responsible if your house burns down!
- You’re welcome to play binaural/meditation music and burn any incense during the ritual if you’d like.
- Smudge your body, your crystal(s), and the space you are conducting the ritual. If you’re indoors, make sure you open a window while you’re doing this step.
- Do a simple and quick grounding exercise to get you started. You can meditate for about 5-10 minutes or however long you need.
- Grab your pen and paper. Write a letter addressed to the person you want to cut cords with. Say all the words you left unsaid. Get all of your emotions out. Take your time. Once you have written it all out, end your letter with this (or something similar): “Even though this relationship no longer serves me, thank you _____ for the experiences we shared. I thank you for positive moments, and I also thank you for the lessons that came with you, even if they were harsh and difficult. I forgive you for _____. I also apologize for _____ and any other way I have contributed to our unhealthy dynamic. I forgive myself for _____ and for staying as long as I did. I am ending our connection. I no longer hold onto a bond that harms me mentally, emotionally, physically, or energetically. I release you. I release myself. Goodbye. And so it is.” You can tailor this part of the letter to suit your needs. This is just an example, but make sure that you hold the other person and yourself accountable for the situation, express gratitude, express forgiveness, and let go.
- Fold your paper three times AWAY from your body and set it aside for now.
- Now, sit or lay down comfortably. It is time for the visualization meditation. Ground yourself again, and once you’re settled, begin the visualization. Picture you and the person naked and standing in front of one another. Observe where the cord is attached on both your body and their body, and take a mental note of it. Now, reach for the attachment on your body, and pull it out of you. Pull it hard, and make sure the roots are out too. Do the same for the attachment on the other person’s body. Picture a light filling up the holes that the cords left until it fills you back up and grows into flesh again. Observe what color your light is, as well as the other person’s light. Now, take the uprooted cord in your hands, and destroy it. Tear it up, stomp on it, shoot, even put lighter fluid on it and burn it. Don’t just cut the cord; obliterate it! Take the remnants of the cord and bury it, or pour it in flowing water. Turn to your person, say your final goodbye, and visualize them fading away. After this visualization, continue meditating as long as you need.
- Once you come out of your visualization, take your folded letter and put it in your heat-safe, non-flammable bowl. Grab your grill lighter, and burn your letter to ashes. You may need to re-light the paper from time to time. Focus on the fire as it burns.
- Dispose of the ashes, but don’t just put it in the trash. Bury them, pour them into flowing water, or let the wind disperse the ashes. You can do this step later if you cannot go outside during the ritual for any reason.
- Congratulations! The cord is now cut.
How do you feel emotionally? Does your body feel any sensations? Do you sense a shift in energy? Where were the cords placed on your bodies, and what colors were the lights? Those indicate which of your chakras need further healing. Reflect on your ritual for a bit. Now you’re free!
Thank you for reading! How did this ritual work out for you? What are your methods for cord cutting? Let me know your thoughts down below.
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